Friday, January 15, 2016

Not Even a Blog - Its Just a Quote

Here's a quote I think everyone needs to read.
Mostly because I am a girl who reads. This quote speaks to my soul. It's beautiful. Its long, but it's incredibly worth the read.
So if you're single and ready to mingle, just hit me up. Because I am a girl who reads. I mean, I'd date me.


“You should date a girl who reads.
Date a girl who reads. Date a girl who spends her money on books instead of clothes, who has problems with closet space because she has too many books. Date a girl who has a list of books she wants to read, who has had a library card since she was twelve.
Find a girl who reads. You’ll know that she does because she will always have an unread book in her bag. She’s the one lovingly looking over the shelves in the bookstore, the one who quietly cries out when she has found the book she wants. You see that weird chick sniffing the pages of an old book in a secondhand book shop? That’s the reader. They can never resist smelling the pages, especially when they are yellow and worn.
She’s the girl reading while waiting in that coffee shop down the street. If you take a peek at her mug, the non-dairy creamer is floating on top because she’s kind of engrossed already. Lost in a world of the author’s making. Sit down. She might give you a glare, as most girls who read do not like to be interrupted. Ask her if she likes the book.
Buy her another cup of coffee.
Let her know what you really think of Murakami. See if she got through the first chapter of Fellowship. Understand that if she says she understood James Joyce’s Ulysses she’s just saying that to sound intelligent. Ask her if she loves Alice or she would like to be Alice.
It’s easy to date a girl who reads. Give her books for her birthday, for Christmas, for anniversaries. Give her the gift of words, in poetry and in song. Give her Neruda, Pound, Sexton, Cummings. Let her know that you understand that words are love. Understand that she knows the difference between books and reality but by god, she’s going to try to make her life a little like her favorite book. It will never be your fault if she does.
She has to give it a shot somehow.
Lie to her. If she understands syntax, she will understand your need to lie. Behind words are other things: motivation, value, nuance, dialogue. It will not be the end of the world.
Fail her. Because a girl who reads knows that failure always leads up to the climax. Because girls who read understand that all things must come to end, but that you can always write a sequel. That you can begin again and again and still be the hero. That life is meant to have a villain or two.
Why be frightened of everything that you are not? Girls who read understand that people, like characters, develop. Except in the Twilight series.
If you find a girl who reads, keep her close. When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you. She’ll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are.
You will propose on a hot air balloon. Or during a rock concert. Or very casually next time she’s sick. Over Skype.
You will smile so hard you will wonder why your heart hasn’t burst and bled out all over your chest yet. You will write the story of your lives, have kids with strange names and even stranger tastes. She will introduce your children to the Cat in the Hat and Aslan, maybe in the same day. You will walk the winters of your old age together and she will recite Keats under her breath while you shake the snow off your boots.
Date a girl who reads because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half-baked proposals, then you’re better off alone. If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads.
Or better yet, date a girl who writes.”

― Rosemarie Urquico


Saturday, December 26, 2015

Fourth Christmas

Today (erm, yesterday?) was the fourth Christmas I spent as a single mom.
That's a crazy thought to wrap my head around, that I've been coordinating multi family Christmas excursions for my littles.
But it's great.
Because I'm no longer in an emotionally abusive relationship.
I'm no longer lacking confidence or self worth.
I'm no longer having panic attacks thinking he'll leave me alone.

Because it's done. Finished. I walked away from a toxic marriage, hoping time apart would heal what we broke and glued back together, that time would allow the glue to do it's work. But instead, the time apart convinced my husband we should never be together.
And I was devastated. I was alone with two children and a baby on the way, and the center of my universe walked out if it.

But in the years that followed, magic happened. I found who I really was as an adult, and I loved myself. I shed the self doubt and self consciousness and embraced who I was. And who I am is a woman who can raise three kids alone. A woman who knows what she wants and refuses to settle for less. A sensitive woman who will not let the world harden her.
That's who I am today.
Four years ago, I was in this bed, mourning my first Christmas alone.
Tonight I'm in this bed, celebrating the person I am because I'm alone.

Tonight, I'm laying in bed, content with who I am.
Tomorrow morning, I will wake up content with who I am.
It took me 23 years to figure it out, but better late than never.
Right?
I love myself.
And I've never been able to say that before.

Obviously I face insecurities and obstacles of my own making. I'm not freaking perfect.
But I'm pretty awesome, and that's pretty cool.
I'm single. I'm alone. And it's pretty liberating!

Sunday, December 20, 2015

A Short Blog Just For the Sake Of Blogging.

To say I've been too busy to blog would be a lie.

I've simply been too lazy.
Unmotivated, I'd say.
Simply unmotivated.

Really, what happens nowadays when I decide to write a blog is this:
I start a facebook status and slowly realize that it is simply too long to be a status.
and then, wow! a blog happens.
crazy, isn't it? :)

so.
today I was driving home from my beloved Mema's house with children in tow, and I discovered something.

There are three things that simply make me want to physically run into vehicles operated by idiots.

these are those three things.


actually none of these things bother me. I just love this movie.

One.

Drivers who do not utilize their FREAKING BLINKER.

seriously, it's there for a reason. So if you start to slow down and there is no blinker I'm like, wait, what's going on here. is there a dog in the road? oh no, not the puppy! OH WAIT YOURE JUST TURNING WHAT YOURE AN IDIOT NO. or if you just drift in and out of lanes. that's wrong too.

Two.

Drivers who do not PULL OVER TO THE SIDE OF THE ROAD WHEN EMERGENCY VEHICLES ARE FLASHING LIGHTS AND WAILING SIRENS AND RUSHING DOWN THE STREET.

If they were dying, or their house was on fire or their child was trapped in a back seat because they were hit by a car that didn't use their blinker, they'd want everyone else to pull over. But since it's not them, they just keep driving. OR EVEN WORSE, THEY JUST STOP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD. No. you pull over. I pull over. We all pull over. It's basically in every driver's ed handbook ever, come on now.

Three.

Drivers who go exactly the speed limit OR SLOWER in the left lane on the highway.

IT'S FOR PASSING. PASSING. YOU ARE NOT LETTING ME PASS ANYONE, YOU ARE A MISERABLE HUMAN BEING. YOUR REPRODUCTIVE CAPABILITIES SHOULD BE TAKEN FROM YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE THE SCUM OF THE EARTH. IF YOU WANT TO GO THE EXACT SAME SPEED AS THE CAR NEXT TO YOU THEN GET IN FRONT OR BEHIND THEM AND DO IT. DO NOT STOP ME FROM PASSING YOU. 


Of course, this can all be compounded by this awful thing:


When all the stations your car has bookmarked (I mean, what's the correct terminology? I press 6 and a country station plays, 3 and it's oldies...  it's a bookmark, right?) AND I DO MEAN EVERY SINGLE ONE is simultaneously ON COMMERCIAL.
and your CD is scratched. And you forgot your aux cord in your house.

that alone will make anyone sad.

Well, that's all folks!


Tuesday, October 27, 2015

I Accidentally Went On A Date With A Man in His Sixties

Hey now, for all of you that are freaking out about that title (ahem, Mema) I just want to point out that I did not purposefully date someone nearly three times my age. But the story makes me laugh.

So, tonight, I was meant to have a date to watch a movie called Crimson Peak. However, after purchasing tickets and getting half way through the line to get popcorn, my totally age appropriate date was unable to stay for personal reasons.
But, well, I had a sitter and the tickets were already paid for... So I stayed.

I bought my own popcorn & went to my seat. As I sat down, a man next to me turns to me and asks "Are you expecting company? I think I might have the wrong row."
I shrugged, and simply said "he couldn't make it in, so you're fine" and started watching the previews.
Apparently the conversation wasn't quite over.

He tells me, "His loss. My girlfriend wouldn't come. She watched the trailer and had to close her eyes!" And I said something along the lines of "oh, I didn't watch the trailer." That's when I suspected that I had made a gross mistake. I'm a pansy. I just saw the name "Tom Hiddleston" and said yes...

He says to me "ha! I asked my coworkers to come, and they both said no too, so I'm going it alone."
Oh dear, Christ. I should get up and leave now. But do I? No. No, I laugh! and I settle back into my chair.
He says "Man, I hope I don't scream. It's gonna be good though."
Shit. I make a mental note to watch every movie trailer I ever intend to see ever. Who cares about Tom Hiddleston and his beautiful face. I'm going to die in here.

The movie starts, and he talks through it, but not enough to be annoying. He comments on plot twists and chuckles every time I jump in my seat or gasp. It's great, feels like watching a movie with Kyle. Tylor & Mom are pansies like me.

I only tried to crawl out of my chair once.
But at the end of the movie, he says "Well, we didn't scream." And I laughed, and say "Oh, but I sure did try to run away." and this guy tells me "yeah, I noticed. But hey, thanks for being my date tonight darlin'. I have to watch a scary movie every year around Halloween to make sure I still got it in me."
And I'm thoroughly amused. I wanna be this guy when I grow up

I tell him as we walk out "Well, I'm gonna go home and watch a few hours of Disney princesses before I can go to sleep tonight." and he just laughs the entire way down the hall. He says "you got a good system there girl. Maybe I'll see ya next year."

and awkward Brittany waves and says "I sure hope so!"

I'm just that cool, ladies and gents.

PS. Here's that trailer, if you have no idea what I sat through. 



Tuesday, October 13, 2015

Oh, Tonight

Tonight I have felt the unending pressure to write something. I climbed into bed at 8:15 and it weighed on my chest, and I have chosen to submit. It's the opposite of writer's block, it's more like... well, the basic instinct to breathe.

I've been reading a lot lately.
By that I mean, I have read 11 trilogies, 5 series and 3 stand alone books in the last three months.
yes, that's right. 53 books in 12 weeks, unless I missed one.
And you see, the problem with reading such great works of art, and do not be mistaken, they are brilliant skillfully crafted pieces, is you have all these great words drifting about in your head. You start to send texts with "acquiesce" and "mediocrity" in them to your mother. You begin to notice that you are completely dissatisfied with monosyllabic words when there are so many greater synonyms to be utilized. You find yourself wondering how to slide words like "plethora" into normal conversation.
It is because of this I write: the parade of particularly pleasant vocables have turned into a palaver of synonyms consistently streaming through my head, begging to be released.
so it will be, tonight.

I am uncertain of what I will be writing about. The obvious choice is the reading material I've been keeping company with/ However, I find that task to be monumental and daunting, considering the mountains of paper I've been making my way through.

I could, perhaps, choose to besmirch a certain two timing trollop... Alas, no. I do not have the patience, nor do I want to sink that low.
But you should know my patience and trust in others has worn thin.

I've toyed around with a singularly splendid writing prompt, however... I haven't completely decided how to piece together the individualized parts of a whole. Possibly in the near future.

I have considered posting a rather morose poem I managed to compose at the height of an anxiety attack, though I have noticed that many people prefer to pretend that all is well with the world and those types of things go largely ignored.

I decided not to write about my children and our adventures tonight, as they are rather well documented on social media. I choose not to disclose my current flirtationship for the opposite reason.

Where does that leave me? With the same mundane posts of the past. 5 Things, Random things, Past events.

But none of those things seem particularly correct for tonight... Oh, tonight. I want to set the world on fire!
Oh wait, no. That's Josh Abbott, not me.

I don't know what to write about tonight. Isn't that funny? I have written hundreds of words but really said nothing, other than I don't know what to write about. Not much has been exceptional, one way or another. Nothing devastating or elating has occurred in the recent past. Nothing extremely exciting or boring will be happening soon.
Well...
Except for HALLOWEEN.
however, I do not have my children for Halloween, and so nothing incredibly exciting will happen then, either.
The fact that I am apathetic about my current situation has become painfully clear to me in the last two minutes.
Lovely.

On that note, since I have nothing particularly invigorating to write, and my computer is pressuring me to update it, I will desist for the evening.

Thank you for reading this notably unnoticeable blog.
I sincerely wish for you all to have a brilliant week.


Thursday, September 17, 2015

A Week in the Life of Minerva

Thursday.

The man who hates me put me in a crate and stuck me in the car of some woman. She let me lose in her room and I immediately found my new super secret hiding space. She spent a while looking for me and started looking things up on her phone like "new cat is hiding" and "is it normal for cats to hide for hours." I know, because I can hear her talking to her "okay google."

Friday.

I can hear that woman looking for me. Ha! She opened a can of tuna to lure me out of my super secret hiding place. It'll never happen. I'm a great hider.
PS. She keeps calling me Minerva.

Saturday.

I am really hungry... Oh shit she found my super secret hiding place! Abandon the sock drawer! Run away! She almost scared the shit out of me, since I haven't been able to get to my litter box undetected.

Sunday.

I snuck out early this morning and ate all the tuna & cat food. She never even saw me, because she was sleeping. Maybe later I will allow her to touch me.

Monday.

I let the woman scratch my ears last night. She was so thrilled. Idiot. I tricked her into putting the book down & to scratch me instead. And just for amusement, I bit her hands all night when they stopped scratching me. I don't care that she was sleeping. Oh, and there are loud tiny humans here. Luckily, I found a hole cut into the wall by the plumbers to service the pipes, and I can now navigate my way to under the bathtub. No one can reach me here. Not even those tiny humans.

Tuesday.

I have decided to explore the rest of the house a little more tonight. I snuck out the door while the woman was in the bathroom, hahaha. Later, I met the resident dog at 3 am and was so afraid, I climbed up the air conditioner and ended up in the attic. The dog will never catch me now. Stupid dog.

Wednesday.

I realized today that I cannot get down from the attic. And my woman is trying to tempt me to emerge from my new secret hiding space with wet cat food, but I just can't make it down. I'll keep quiet... for now.

Thursday.

I showed a different taller woman my face to let her know I'm in the attic. She pulled me out of the attic despite my objections of being held. Despite my physical molestation I suffered through, I ate all the cat food and am now being scratched behind the ears again. Even by the tiny humans. They're all suckers.



I'm happily curled up on my woman's chest, preventing her from actually reading the book she's holding. That's all for tonight... or is it?


Thursday, August 20, 2015

Tinder

Oh yes, I'm one of the people who unabashedly states that she's on Tinder. It's true.
And I'm freaking hilarious.

Let me tell you, the running dialogue in my head is amusing to say the least. I will ask opinions from people around me (my baby cousin is one of them) and then sit there and swipe left a zillion times in a row.
Why?

Let me tell you reasons I've actually swiped left (said no way)


  1.  oh no, your name is not "Big Pimpin"
  2. you look like you're twelve
  3. why are you holding that fish? Not impressed.
  4. ALL OF YOUR PICTURES ARE GROUPS. I DON'T WANT TO PLAY WHERE'S WALDO.
  5. your name is Norman
  6. why are you taking pictures in the gym. stop it.
  7. who are all these women in your pictures?
  8. hahaha, it says right here you're actually 17. LIAR.
  9. you look homeless
  10. you are not cute
  11. you look creepy
  12. your about me says you're looking for "fun"
  13. what does that mean, "a partner in crime but not a partner for life?" No.
  14. you have more jewelry on than I do.
  15. none of your pictures show me your face
  16. you are not heath ledger
  17. why are you surfing in every single one of your pictures, we are in the desert
  18. you're not even from here.
  19. you're old
  20. you're dating my friend
  21. you're married to my friend's friend.
  22. you wrote you're married but looking for fun on your profile
  23. my brothers name is Kyle
  24. you are shorter than me
  25. you're wearing a Cowboys jersey
  26. you are taking selfies in front of a floral shower curtain
  27. you won't swipe right on me cuz I'm fat.
  28. your smile is murder-y
  29. you are cuter than me.
  30. dang it you're a smoker
reasons why I've swiped right (said okay)

  1. oh look you have a cute dog!
  2. you are tallllllll
  3. riding a horse, yes.
  4. look how cute you are with that tiny child!
  5. YOU'RE A WHOVIAN
  6. I like your shirt
  7. you said you just want to buy me tacos and touch my butt.
  8. yo,u sir, are driving a jeep
  9. your eyes are pretty
  10. hahaha you're funny, okay
  11. I bet you have a cute butt.
  12. Harry Potter marathons? I'm in.
  13. you are wearing a bowtie
  14. I think you might be a whovian...
  15. OMG TATTOOS.
  16. I like your hair
  17. you're cute
  18. I also love Netflix
  19. oh man, you look so good with that guitar.
  20. cowboy hats are a yes
  21. I think you could probably pick me up
  22. cheesy pick up line for the win
  23. you're reading a book in that picture
  24. what does that even mean? okay, I hope we match because I gotta ask you about that.
  25. you're British? Why are you in Odessa? Let me love you?
  26. hahaha, that's a Will Ferrell Quote
  27. you are wearing a tigger costume and that's great
  28. you are holding a cat
  29. you are holding a CAMERA! We should go shoot together.
  30. I just wanna see if you swipe right on me or not.
There you go.
innerworkings of my brain.

love you guys :)